37 Weeks

I am almost through my 37th week of pregnancy, and there are no words that can even come close to capturing the way I feel right now. The best thing I can come up with is a sound... a long, exasperated exhale.

WOOSAH.

At this point, I am fully aware that my body is no longer under my control (not that I've had much control over the last few months, but now it's completely 100% gone). I feel like a walking wrecking ball. Not even a walking wrecking ball - more like a waddling wrecking ball. My feet have swollen past the point of repair - no amount of soaking, lifting, or massaging helps anymore (and TRUST ME hubby and I have tried). You know when you gain a few pounds and get that unattractive little muffin top over the waist of your jeans? Yeah, I have that with my FEET. When I get home from work and take my shoes off, I have two muffin-topped behemoths that used to be my cute little feet. Yesterday I was staring at them in amazement, realizing that they looked like they belonged on someone who weighed about 500 pounds. It's past the point of uncomfortable. It's painful.

You think I'm exaggerating.

I'm totally not.

Moms warned me about the dreaded last month of pregnancy. And I just smiled, nodded, and thought to myself "I can totally handle it". I'm eating my words. Consider this my waving a white flag to the ninth month.

I really, honestly try not to complain. But sometimes you just gotta vent. I know it's temporary. And I know with all of my heart that when it's all said and done, it is going to be so worth the misery. Ask me in a month, when Luke is here, and I'll probably tell you that it really wasn't that bad. I've heard about mom-memory. Once the baby arrives safe and healthy, the bad memories of pregnancy and labor/delivery begin to fade away. I can't wait for that.

WOOSAH.

There is a silver lining, though. I went in for my now-weekly OB visit on Monday, where I was "checked" for the first time. I'll spare the graphic details, but I am SO EXTREMELY HAPPY to report that I've started to dilate. Not much. But to a pregnant woman, any dilation is good. It means the end of the tunnel is close. The end of pregnancy is within reach. The baby will be here soon. Unfortunately, there's no way of knowing yet how soon. We'll have a better idea after my visit next Monday, when we see if I've dilated further. Right now we're just sitting on a bunch of maybe's.

Dr. Wonderful said her guess was that I wouldn't make it to my due date. She even said he could possibly be here by the end of my 38th week. Which she then followed up with "Or you could be one of those who goes past her due date." Uhh, no thanks. I choose Plan A - let's get this show on the road. Pass me some Pitocin and a jar of jalapenos and we can take care of everything this weekend, if you're free!